Loss of innocence;
It’s known as the transition between pure, young childhood and the maturation into a semblance of adulthood. Listed in some books like To Kill A Mocking Bird, it’s a common theme in the everyday world. Everyone grows up at some point and becomes an adult – Some doing so sooner than others. Growing up isn’t necessarily the same for everyone, in much the same sense. I’d like to think in essence, adulthood is to understand the world isn’t so perfect and that there will always be someone who wants to step on you. It is to handle problems as they come in a mature fashion, and to make choices that are for the good of friends and family.
If this is all that loss of innocence truly is, why then is it that so many consider incredibly innocent acts to be sins and impure? A good example of this would be the act of sex. Sex, as we all know, is an act required to reproduce. Why, though, is it something that is considered disgusting and impure, leading to degrading remarks of ‘whore’ and ‘slut’? Why is such an act demeaned and shamed as something that is so immoral, that it should not be committed by anyone except those who are of a socially acceptable age?
A moment of passion and lust isn’t so much of a sin as anything else. A biological function, spurring us to commence the act, is not an impurity like some seem to believe. It is a natural process that shouldn’t be demeaned as it is. As many people as there are that abuse sex in the way they do, why should it count for each and every person who commits the act out of love?
My name slipped off her lips in a low, breathless whisper as we finally broke our passionate kiss, one that’d lasted for several moments. She tasted sweet, in a way I couldn’t exactly describe. It left both of us panting for air and feeling too hot on this already heated summer night. Hadn’t this originally started out as nothing more than cuddling with a few touches here and there? It was hard to think about it now. No matter how we’d gotten into this position, my mind was beginning to cloud over with what I assumed was lust. I was really and truly feeling lust for the girl of my dreams, whom I was now having trouble holding myself back from.
A blush was very evident on my cheeks as I gently laid her down on my bed, gulping with anticipation of what was to come very shortly. The look she gave me as I watched her, it begged me to keep going and to not stop. I had doubts that I’d be able to stop myself now that I’d been given this chance to finally give my everything to her. My reasoning was slipping to the back of my mind, worries of what others would think or the possible consequences of my actions temporarily fading with it. In this moment, all that mattered was her and this feeling.
A shudder ran through my body at her tone. Her voice was just as pleading as the look she gave me. She wanted me to take her, to be her first just as much as she would be my first. I couldn’t deny her that; I loved her with all of my heart and there was no way I could say no to her request. This was bound to happen sooner or later; we weren’t the adolescents we used to be. Nearly adults at seventeen years old, the consequences of our actions didn’t matter as much now. It didn’t matter in the end what happened as a result. I wasn’t about to leave her; we would have a family together some day and we’d decided this years ago.
“O-Of course P-Paula…”
My voice was shaky, nervousness highlighting the moment. Our first times… That was a special thing, wasn’t it? I wouldn’t want it to be with anyone else, either. Scrambling onto the bed as well, I soon found myself on top of her and leaned in to continue our passionate kiss. Our tongues met each other, soon exploring each other’s mouths just as they had only minutes previously. It made my heart beat faster and it was starting to feel unbearably hot even with only a T-shirt and shorts on. Our clothes would end up discarded soon, I was sure.
Paula uttered a light moan into the kiss, her arms wrapping around my shoulders as she attempted to pull me closer. In response, I did the opposite and pulled away from her, earning a pout of as a result. Her obvious dissatisfaction soon faded as I smiled lopsidedly and began to pull off my shirt, lifting it over my head before I tossed it down on the ground. My shorts soon followed suit and Paula’s already obvious blush seemed to worsen tenfold. She didn’t move an inch as she stared at me, only in a pair of boxers now.
After a few moments, however, she took it as a prompt to finally take off her dress, moving off of the bed to do so. She turned her back to me for a moment, hands fumbling around at the front where there were a few buttons helping to keep the sleeveless fabric on and in place. Once the buttons had become undone, a simple shrug of her shoulders was all it took for the dress to come sliding down her shoulders, pooling around her ankles. She was left in only a lacy pink bra and a pair of perfectly white panties. The sight made me gulp hard, an oh-so-obvious tent starting to form in my boxers.
She turned to face me finally, an awkward smile tugging at her lips as her fingers teased along her bra. The fabric of the straps started to slip down porcelain shoulders, fully revealing flawless, beautiful skin in its wake. All I could do was sit and watch, mouth running dry at the sight of her body. Her hands slid around back for a moment or so as she clumsily attempted to undo the clips that held it in place. Soon after, there was a gentle snapping sound as she finally undid the binding fabric, letting it fall to the ground in the same fashion as her dress. Her breasts, finally exposed to me, caused a painful throb to run through my lower regions. If my boxers hadn’t felt quite so restricting before, they certainly did now.
I watched in dumbstruck silence as she strode toward the bed purposefully, her hands now starting to tease and tug at her only remaining article of clothing. All rational thought I’d had left over was completely gone to the back of my mind now, instincts fully setting in in their stead. I needed her now as much as she needed me in this intimate moment so many called impure and a sin. Could it even be considered a sin when it’s done completely out of love for your partner? I highly doubt it. Though, thoughts like that weren’t so important right then. What was important was when Paula slipped her perfect white panties down her thighs, stepping out of them soon after and leaving them on the ground to be picked up later. She was completely nude before my eyes and it seemed like the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen.
She had a perfectly curved body that exuded femininity, delicate breasts that were neither small nor large, and curled golden hair covering her more intimate lower regions. These were just some of the things I noticed about her in the moment. More importantly, however, I still found the most beauty in her face. Her face was framed with beautiful, curly blonde hair that ended at her shoulders in a way that reminded me of silk ribbons. Everything about her was perfect, personality wise and physically equally. She was the girl of my dreams and for so long now we’d been dating and in love. What more could I ever ask for?
After Paula had taken off her panties, I slowly blinked and shook off my momentary shock. As flustered as I was, I couldn’t just keep Paula waiting while I gazed lustfully at her body. Neither of us wanted to wait, surely, so I needed to speed things up for both of us. I shifted somewhat on the bed, tugging at the waistband of my boxers before I pulled them down hastily and tossed them down with the rest of our clothes. My hasty actions seemed to have earned a slight giggle from Paula, but any thought on that matter was pushed aside as she crawled onto my lap and kissed me passionately, just as before. Bare skin against bare skin now, our bodies rubbing up against one another sent chills up my spine.
It wasn’t long until we broke our kiss for a third time tonight. My hand slid between our bodies, gently taking hold of my engorged self for the final act of our courtship. The contact was brief, only lasting for a moment while I positioned myself to enter Paula, who shivered with excitement as a result. I was shaking slightly, both out of nervousness and excitement alike. This was it; we were really and truly moments away from sharing something as special as this. This wasn’t like the one night stands that were becoming ever more popular. This was so very different; it was filled with actual love and dedication. That was what was important in the end.
One gentle movement of my hips and I started to slip inside, a feeling of pleasure beginning to wash over me in the process. Paula felt absolutely wonderful, in a way that’s somewhat difficult for me to explain. It felt almost ‘soft’ slipping into her, further and further as I lowered her down onto myself gently. There was a slight constriction around me, which only aided in driving me to push in more, gleaning what I could from the pressure. I heard her gasp and hug onto me tightly once I was about halfway in, though whether it was out of pleasure or pain of the first time, I wasn’t entirely sure. I couldn’t stop now, though; my thoughts had long since stopped processing and all that was left was a raw need to climax. With my hands at her hips, I painstakingly pushed her down the rest of the way as carefully as I could, only to gain a breathy moan once fully inside.
“N-Ness… It feels so good…!”
That was a good confirmation that I hadn’t accidentally hurt her upon first entering. I was vaguely aware in the back of my mind that the first time was supposed to be painful for girls, but it appeared as though it wasn’t so true in Paula’s case. That was fine by me, because I really hated the idea of hurting her for any reason at all. I closed my eyes and bit onto my lower lip slightly, lifting Paula up gently before pushing her back down with some force, my hips meeting hers in one swift movement. The friction was absolutely blissful and sent little shocks of pleasure throughout my body. It was enough to earn a soft groan from me. Just the same, the movement was enough to make Paula cry out in pleasure, too.
I repeated the action over and over again, resulting in cries of pleasure from both of us. With each movement, my pace and force seemed to increase and I could feel an almost unbearable heat building up. A hand soon found its way to Paula’s chest, my other still at her hip to guide her movements. There was no way we couldn’t last much longer and that was all too obvious now. A few more thrusts were all it took. In an almost sudden spasm, Paula constricted around me as she climaxed, letting out a loud moan that I was almost worried the neighbors would hear. With that delicious pressure added around me, I couldn’t hold back and soon reached my own climax. My body quivered as my seed was loosed inside of her, my hand still guiding her as we rode out our orgasms.
It didn’t take long, the pleasure soon tapering off into a feeling of satisfaction and contentment. Afterwards, Paula gently slumped against me out of exhaustion, panting rather audibly. Ever so gently I shifted my hips and pulled out of my beloved, holding her close in the bliss of the moment. From simple touches to kissing, we’d gone the entire way and I held no remorse for it. Here in my arms was the girl I wanted to marry. She was beautiful and perfect to me and while we now held a chance of consequence for our actions of love, I didn’t regret it for even a moment.
Why would I regret committing an innocent act of love with the one person I wanted to be at my side for the rest of my life?
Sex is a lot of things, but it isn’t a loss of innocence or a sin when it’s done in the name of true love.